Dear 17-Year-Old Me

Hey girl. I hope you aren’t too much in your feels right now.

I am writing this to you as a 22-year-old woman who is currently laying in bed and reminiscing about the past. Recently, I stumbled upon a letter you wrote at the age of 17 to future us. Not going to lie, I might’ve let a tear slip. It was just so crazy to experience the emotions you had back then.

You were young, yet so sad and angry. That entire year had been a rather awful one. You went through a lot–loss, betrayal, and uncomfortable change. Things that a normal 17-year-old shouldn’t have to experience at all. But you did–you went through hell and back. And guess what? You made it out alive.

Firstly, I want you to know that you did your best. For the cards that fate dealt you, you did wonderfully. It wasn’t your job to make people stay. You were broken; and yet, you poured your heart to people. And it’s not your fault that people chose to leave–it was never your fault.

It was their choice, and they’ll have to live with that decision.

Secondly, your emotions were valid. It was okay for you to cry and miss people–it is okay to feel. You know, having emotions remind us that we’re alive. That we are breathing and members of the human race. Obviously, it sucks and it hurts. Often times, it feels like things will never get better. However, I want you to know that you were right–time does heal.

You are so much stronger now.

Thirdly, know that high school is such a small portion of your life. I know that right now, you feel like high school is the end all be all–but it isn’t. Just know that after graduation, you are going to experience some incredible things. Of course, college is exhausting–you’re honestly in for a whirlwind–but you are going to have many great opportunities.

And you’ll come to realize what’s important in life.

Fourthly, the pain you went through doesn’t define you. I’ll be honest with you, 17-year-old me, life gets difficult after 2015. You’re going to question a lot of things and probably cry more tears than you imagined–more tears than you’ve already shed. Life is going to really test your limits. However, despite what is going to happen to you, you are still you.

You are amazing, and I hope you know that.

Lastly, I want you to know that people love and care about you. They really do. I know you often feel unloveable, but you are so loved. You’re special and one of a kind. Even though people love you, you have to learn to love yourself too. It’s going to be a process–trust me, I already went through it–but you’ll get there. I believe in you.

After all, self-love can change the world.